I'm wondering if you felt you were being treated like a child because your trauma has you stuck in that "helpless child" mode? You were taught at a very young age to keep your mouth shut or someone would get hurt. It was very likely true, too. You feared for your safety and that of your mom's so talking to an adult psychologist may make you feel like that scared child again. I'm just putting it out there.

It could also be that the psychological wasn't very good or you simply didn't have a rapport with her.

Due to coronavirus, psychologists, psychiatrists, and therapists are conducting their services via phone or face chat. Maybe you'll feel safer in the comfort of your own home speaking to someone. Set up the environment with soothing background noises, dim the lights or use candles.. perhaps half a glass of wine? And put yourself out there.

It's hard to trust someone and break the habit of concealing trauma. I've been there, too. In order to get past it, we need to push through the discomfort and try. Let her know this is extremely difficult for you to talk about and she'll work at your pace.

You sound relatively young (college student) and the longer you keep your trauma, the harder it is to address it.

My advice is to make a goal for yourself. Schedule an appointment for you to make that first call to whomever can help you set an appointment. You owe it to yourself.

I'm sorry you went through that. Your stepfather no longer has influence over you. I really hope your mother is no longer with him.

Give it a try!