Everyone who has written, thank you so much for sharing your own stories, experiences, and support. It means a lot. I'm touched, and I also hear you guys. Thank you for letting ME (and all here) witness your own experiences.

I do not really know if my bully will change. I'm not holding my breath though. I've booted this person from my life. It would be fantastic if they changed. But I know we can't change anyone, nor do I want to be involved with them to try to "help."

I take solace in not being a bully, myself. I'm proud of how I interact w others and feel I have integrity, can admit when I'm wrong etc.

And yes, like seesaw said, its empowering to name a bully's behavior for what it is. Its healing.