Quote:
Originally Posted by divine1966
I am shocked. I have never ever heard of anyone of any faith or no faith not allowed to attend a funeral or shiva or anything else related to a Jewish person passing. There are no Jewish customs prohibiting non Jews taking part in shiva, none, no such rules (they don’t have to participate but they aren’t to be deliberately excluded). I’d say your ex and his family made some stuff up for whatever reason. Not good. How do you say to your spouse not to come? Anyone can attend anything. Especially once’s spouse.
Glad to hear he is an ex.
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No, it wasn't my ex. It was his brother and his brother's wife. We were in California and they were in Florida. They expressly told my ex that I would not be allowed to attend. As I recall my ex was afraid to tell me...like I would go crazy over it. Well, I was upset. But so was my ex. His brother and his wife very explicitly said I could not attend because I wasn't Jewish. They really took charge of the whole thing and we were so far away we couldn't really be a part of the arrangements...which happened very quickly. At the time they were extremely Orthodox. So if they just made that up...how bizarre! They told my ex that everything was being done very orthodox...and my ex was like, whatever. He was really just upset about his Mom passing away very suddenly. We both were.
No, my ex really had nothing to do with it. He wasn't religious at all. Anyway...we already had been through a lot because when we decided to get married BOTH SIDES of our families refused to attend any kind of wedding. We ended up getting married by a Unitarian minister with a handful of friends. So we were already "warriors" about this kind of thing.
Neither of our families were happy about us getting married for cultural and religious reasons.
I really want to add we had a very happy marriage until the very end and the divorce was amiable. He was and is a great father.
PS Yes, good advice to stick with my kind-hearted brother, my sweet son, and his also-sweet girlfriend. It's a small tribe at the moment but a very nice one.
