DBT is hard at times.. because its changing your thoughts and reactions to XYZ ..

I dont have Borderline but I have a few strong traits .. I have a huge issue with abandonment... years ago if my husband is 7 mins late from getting home I immediately think OMG car accident, Is he hurt? did the car roll off the road? could he be in the creek and half way to drowning, Should I text him again ? I've only sent 12 in the last 11 mins! I have gone full on panic attack for no reason........ So I have had to reel all that back in and be more rational and use logic..

Has he been late coming home and been in an accident before? no , so Why am I assuming the worst? Okay people run late, maybe he stopped at the store, maybe hes calling the kids( we dont have cell service at our house so we drive to town to use the phone)
My husband knows that I have this issue but I cant make it ALL HIS issue too... If he knows he will be running more than 25-30 mins late he will sent me a Text, and its usually " do you need anything I'm headed home?"

So I have to change MY reaction to him running late...

But like if my husband has forgotten to turn his phone off silent and Hes late by 35-45 mins and I have sent a couple texts he doesnt respond and he comes home an hour later??? I am angry because it scared me ! and I can be mad at him and that's fine, that's not over the top reaction..

So its about relearning how to react to people and your life events so that emotionally your not on a roller coaster from hell. It can be very mentally overwhelming at times.. But I think Borderline or not DBT can be helpful to pretty much everyone in some way or another.

What my friends have told me is often its 2 steps forward 2 back , one forward half back then 2 steps forward then 1/4 step back.. But over time it does get easier..Its just a process, its life and its messy sometimes but we just keep trying