Honestly ..... We do not have control over anyone else. We can only make changes in our lives to stay away from toxic people.. I am so sad that your Mom would say such awful things..

You control who can have access and hurt you..

Call her up and tell her you will no longer allow her to treat you this way and if you are on the phone and she starts tell her you will hang. You are absolutely DONE ...the end..Hang up...... Do not answer her call.

If you get together and she says one thing hurtful.. Pick up your purse and walk out the door...

Yes she is your Mother but that does not give her the right to abuse you...