I feel like society wants me to become a very different version of myself than I actually am. Society wants me to become a productive member of people as a subclass. I don't know. I'll perpetually exist in the periphery. I would rather exist this way than become what society wants me to become. I also wish I could become a musician. But at some level, I already am one, and look where that's gotten me. I feel like I am a thinker, that's my allure, if you will. People are telling me conflicting things. You know, like my therapist saying I should have more self-esteem or whatever. I don't get that one. I feel like there's always room to play with people's expectations of us and what society actually expects of us. It's weird to think about, really. I mean, could it be true that everything we've come to believe is actually false? And yet people are always not finding "meaning" in life. Not finding purpose or direction. And in some respect, they might have some sense. Though I don't have any perception on how I am perceived by others. Nor do I have any perception of how others perceive me. And yet it seems like going forward with any sort of "plan" in life wouldn't be sufficient. That's why I continue to write. That's why I continue to make stuff up.