where I live (NYC) it is rich is opportunities. with Covid 19 much of those opportunities have moved online and pay per view and cable services. One such thing I found quite interesting and educational was one day I was scrolling through my local online services/ educational opportunities/ workshops/ seminars. I came across something that caught my eye. I "opened" to read the description. one liner mental illness in a virtual world, how safe are you?

the pay per view show dealt with having various mental illnesses and surfing the net, joining groups and forums and general internet safety.

The one thing that caught my attention was that they stated statistically those with dissociative disorders are ...........more........ susceptible to being internet stalked in online forums due to their easily triggered dissociative abilities. Because people with dissociative disorders are constantly, seemlessly (with little to no detection or outward signs) switching moods, behaviors and emotions. when they see something online or in videos, or are having video calling experiences that are triggering to them they move rather quickly from one extreme to another.

according to the show I watched on pay per view this uncontrollable emotions and behaviors leave a dissociative open to being stalked and attacked online with this new virtual world we have had to become. they do not have the control of their own selves therefore they tend to be in two categories.. the victim/ prey or they are the perpetrators of committing the stalking/ attacking others.

Victims/ prey in this virtual world we have had no choice but to embrace due to covid 19 are those who find their self to be constantly followed by the same online persons. then when they do post or have discussions the same online persons are right there on their.. behinds.... the show used another word. the victims/ prey are the ones that are constantly being corrected, put in their place, same emotional abuse that the dissociative person has undergone when they were being abused by their childhood abusers.

most times a dissociative victim/ prey according to this pay per view show called mental illness in a virtual world, do not realize that they are being attacked and stalked. this is because they are constantly switching when triggered.

The second category those dissociatives that become the abusers, the perpetrators of stalking and attacking others are aware that they are doing so and are able to control this behavior. they sit waiting for their victim/ prey to post or talk during the discussion and jump right on them every time. they are hypervigilient in making sure their target doesnt get past them. even it if means laying quiet on the forum or in the video calling situations until their prey/ victim posts or talks. they are taking out their anger and frustration of what happened to their selves out on others in the same emotional abusive ways that they their selves have been abused, much like a sexual abuser has most times been abused their self.

to me its ironic that when I am online reading posts anywhere I feel like I can pick up on when others are being stalked and attacked, who the victims and preys are and who the perpetrators are but not always protect myself from them. So out of curiosity I took the shows quizzes and discovered Im much better at it then I thought at protecting myself online.

the food for thought questions on the victims / prey side was...

do you find that you gravitate towards those that are being talked or replied to in a way meant to punish, deminish/ demorlaize, make corrections to or attack them?

do you find that you and your virtual discussions need to be just right before posting or saying what you want to say for fear that the moment you post someone, most likely the same person will jump on you and what you are trying to say?

do you notice the same persons responding/ replying to you in a punitive, condescending or attempts to put you in your place, correct or put you and your replies down?

Do you notice the same persons responding / replying to you in a way that they are trying to manipulate others into not believing anything you say or do, isolate you?

if you can say yes to these basic questions you are the victim/ prey. you most likely are being stalked / attacked in the same emotional abusive ways child abusers and domestic violence abusers use in attempts to control their victims and isolate them in abusive ways.

on the virtual abusers / perpetrators food for thought questions ..

do you have intentions to purposely read posts or participate in virtual discussions by the same persons you do not agree with with the intention of making sure they dont get one past you?

do you feel like you need to watch the same person online so that you can correct what they are saying and posting, demoralize them, put them and their discussions down as being wrong, distasteful?

Do you respond to the same person either directly or non directly in a negative way as a way to isolate, counter, or put them down rather than using walking away, mute, ignore, and other virtual tools?

Do you sit quietly just waiting for the same person to post or talk so that you can jump in and correct, demoralize, put them down, attempt to make sure no one else will believe them/ isolate them?

if you can answer yes to these questions you fall into the category of abuser/perpetrator.

then the show went into how to move from being the victim/ prey or abuser/ perpetrator.

victim / prey....

make an intention to stay grounded and present when in virtual discussions online or in video calling. not only does this help you practice your therapy tools it also helps you to recognize the stalkers/ emotional abusers / attackers.

know that you are not doing anything wrong. what you say and post is important to someone, maybe not the stalkers/ abusers but it is important for you to have your freedom to say or post too many years have gone by where your abusers in childhood had that emotional abuse and control over you, its time for you take back your voice and be heard. it does not matter if you say the sky is black and some one else says that BS the sky is blue. how things are for you, your location, your culture and so forth (the show went more in detail Im paraphrasing ) is how it is for you. shout it loud and clear, take back that voice of yours that has been abused from you, stand tall and be you. be a survivor not a victim nor someones prey.

check out the virtual "tools" used in forums and video calling, know how to use mute, ignore, report the stalkers/ attackers.

no one wants to mute/ignore or report but if no one does so then the virtual stalkers/ attackers will continue stalking/ attacking those they know will not mute/ ignore/ report. In non virtual world there are laws against stalking and attacking others. the virtual world also have their codes of conduct and laws. the only way to stop virtual bullies/ emotional abusers/ stalkers / attackers is by the victims following through with using the virtual tools for protecting their self and reporting the abusers.

If you find that you are dissociating during your virtual discussions in forums or video calling immediately end the discussion and reground, this closes the door on leaving yourself a victim or prey to an abuser/ stalker.

for the stalkers/ emotional abusers/ perpetrators

recognize your pattern. the first step to changing is recognizing the negative behavior

make an intention not to respond / stay away from your victim/ prey. this will be hard to do but will get easier as you continue to fight your habit of doing to others what was done to you.

talk to your mental health provider. they may know of ways for you to turn away from emotionally, virtually abusing / stalking / attacking others in this new virtual world we now live in.

all virtual situations (forums, zoom, ect..) have moderators / administrators that over see the virtual world. contact them when you may feel the need to correct or put someone elses discussions down, or put someone in their place. its their job to keep everyone safe and ensure the rules of the virtual world is safe for everyone including you.

I found this show to be very informative and I have only touched on what it contained. if you have cable pay per view you may want to check it out, it cost me $25.00 per hour episode and there was 6 episodes. its called mentally ill in a virtual world. it cam be found under pay per view documentaries.