Yes, in my opinion, you're right in thinking that the low self esteem is influencing your thoughts, very much so. And so that's obviously an area that you can address further still. I have very similar thoughts a lot, very self doubting thoughts, but these days I seem to be getting better at just letting them go and and just saying to myself 'bleh, I'm going to focus on the reality in front of me, not these echoes in the mind'.

Just wanted you to know also that, although I respect your wish to want to be a different weight, a lot of men, women, whomever, still see the beauty and attractiveness in a woman's form regardless. It's just a well known fact, that's all.

Also, friends are friends and just try to appreciate the fact that your friend, for example, is happy with your company. That's all. So that's some of my unsolicited advice there.

Thank you.

To be honest, I need to lose some weight too, though. My gut has now developed a definite 'overhang'. 🤣