Hi Fuzzy,

There are times when being polite pays off and times when it might not be the most effective way to handle things/people.

I feel it's important to learn to be assertive. Usually, it is possible to be polite, yet direct and clear in representing our needs, desires/goals. Have you looked into how to be assertive?

"Assertiveness is a skill regularly referred to in social and communication skills training. Being assertive means being able to stand up for your own or other people's rights in a calm and positive way, without being either aggressive, or passively accepting 'wrong.' "

There is a lot of info here:

Assertiveness - An Introduction | SkillsYouNeed'.

I am positive you can master this skill.