Ok. I already shared the examples: she is ALWAYS holding the kid during family gatherings, walks etc for 11 years. And constantly making him her pair. Halloween? Matching costumes, Christmas? Matching costumes. Matching outfits for pictures. And constantly posting pictures of the kid (publicly) even when the child is doing normal stuff on his own (playing, homework, walking...) with some sort of sentence about HER. How he needed her, how he talked to her, how he and her something.

The kid is a tool. She likes him? Sure. She should like him? Sure. But this goes beyond that. To a point that is way too obvious.


I think none of you understand what 11 years of a constant behavior means. I'm not saying she posts some pictures here and there for her friends to see, I'm not saying she was very protective when the kid was a baby...or overposted pictures of the child and herself with the baby in the beginning (I understand people get enthusiastic with the thrill and novelty. But then life goes on. Everyone grows out of it. She didn't. and she's an adult. So by now she should let the kid breathe for himself the vast majority of the time. The umbilical cord has healed. It's 11 years - the whole kid's life! - showing him as a tool to show herself as his bestie. Even when he's not "with" her.

And this is public (for those who think it's a private account). Meshing their names in a joint account.


It's not a one thing here or there.


It's a recurring, frequent constant thing, that's going on for a decade, and it's not about the kid, it's about her need to be loved and validated by others. That I don't have a doubt. It's so obvious (and I'm not a stupid person - I studied children's and developmental psychology and educational sociology in university. I know what is normal behavior and balanced parenting)


I wouldn't be asking "WHAT TYPE OF PERSONALITY" does this (not to diagnose a particular person - it's irrelevant to me if it's her or another random creature. It could be anyone else I'd see displaying this behavior - as actually I stated right in the beginning of my post: "I've seen other people doing similar things"). if I didn't see so clearly that this is not about love, it's about her need to be validated.


My question was: what type of personality does this (what are the theories/labels for this specific type of insecurity) so I can understand how these type of people function and how others can function with her.

99% of the people who for some freaking reason read the title wrote/reacted with judgemental crap.

I find amazing that 99% are here to help anyone on this forum with such a narrow mind.

"Who told you man only like pretty women?" "You're looking for names to spit at her!" "your parents are narcissists", "you this and that".
And my favorite? "We can't diagnose people based on a post, it's against the rules, you're asking because you are this and that and you think this and that probably because you're jealous, and you are this ant that (diagnosing me)"...
What a joke.

I have the LABELS I was looking for: anxious attachment. Enmeshment. Insecure. Those are things and yes, psychology seems to agree that NO! This is not healthy parenting and typically extremely insecure people does it.

And no. I'm not worried with the safety of the child. I'm not calling the social services and I'm not going to "visit" them to see how they live.

It's a question about psychology research on certain types of (UNHEALTHY) behaviors not about an individual.