YIkes! That article said stonewalling is the worst of the four, criticism, defensiveness, contempt, stonewalling. There are elements of the other 3 horsemen in her behavior too. I don't know what to do. I can't talk about my issues, because I get shot down. I can't talk about her issues because she won't let me respond. Am I just not being assertive enough? I don't think I should have to be. It shouldn't be this hard.