I think our couples counselor saw the red flags in him. She believed me when it came to his "storytelling" and inappropriate behaviours. I don't think she wanted to be further involved, and instead recommended us to seek individual counseling. Knowing what I know now, I'd be hanging myself if we pursued couples counseling again. I've read multiple articles that advised against that, too. Through our benefits, we're only allowed 3-6 sessions per file. We can keep opening new files as long as the topic of interest changes.

He's making efforts. He's trying not to be so reactive, which will take time. He's trying to be more present (until another woman or text message is in his view). He's backed off with a specific demand/expectation regarding our 3yr old. I dug my heals. He's clearly working through his book.

He's also been up and down a lot. I'm not sure what's triggering his moods.. his out-of-the-blue "happy" self.. to his near tears personality. It doesn't seem to come within the family. It's as if an exterior source is affecting him that I know nothing about. I could even blame myself because I've distanced myself from him, but then, where's the happiness coming from? He tells me he "doesn't know".. one of compulsive liars' go-to lines.

I do feel he's desperately trying to convince himself that he's a "good person" so he can blame his behaviours elsewhere. I worry there's a darker side within him that has yet to surface fully. I'm worried that due to the lack of trust, I'm inadvertently creating scenarios in my head that don't exist because I'm afraid of these unknowns.