Oh, my problem is that I didn't want to be sneaked up on. And I didn't want to hurt her. I just need my solitude sometimes and some people don't understand nor respect that.

I finally emailed her that I just didn't have the energy to see her right now. She asked if there was anything she could do, which was nice. Problem solved. It just took a day of anxiety.

The problem was, as long as I was feeling powerless, I saw her as the enemy. Now I know that I want to maintain a friendship.

She has bpd and her manic stuff triggers my stuff.