And on top of everything, he spends lots of time pseudo shopping for expensive gem jewelry for me that he cannot afford in the least.

We come from opposite sides of the coin when it comes to the fundamentals of what matters.

He also takes after his father and is a spitting image of his father. He never "individuated" as I did, so growth-wise and spiritually, I am beyond him in my development. He is behind me and has yet to actually individuate and become his own person. He wishes he were wealthy and refuses to live in the real world. I am very much in the real world, though I do wish I could be wealthy too. But I am very much my own person, and I very much became my own person in adulthood, separate from my parents. He never did. He still has yet to truly grow up. He gets offended when I tell him his father is abusive, which he is! And he's even admitted it himself by saying he's been abusive to hospital staff! But when I say it, it's a personal insult, and that's because he's always admired his father and takes after him in behavior. He feels he failed in life because he's not as wealthy as his father or brother. He still looks up to that standard and believes he should have followed suit.

We're like oil and water in many ways. And in some ways, we're compatible, but not where it really matters. Not at the true heart of what makes a marriage work long-term.