Yesterday he was looking at gem jewelry online again and I asked him "honey, why are you looking at things you cannot afford to buy?" and he said "because I love you and I want to get you something nice." I only told him "that's really sweet of you, but you don't need to buy me anything." I did not say (yet again), "please don't buy anything you cannot truly afford and please don't use credit to buy me nice things".

This is yet another example of how we're not on the same page about finances. He thinks that buying me jewelry shows me that he loves me, just as his father did with his mother, but it's not what I care about. Yes, I LOVE jewelry, but bought from a checking account, not on credit when someone cannot afford it!

I have said these things over and over again to him, and it seems it goes in one ear and out another. He doesn't want to listen to ME.... there's something about reason and logic that escapes him, especially when it comes to ME telling him these things. It's like he is being stubborn and doesn't want to follow what I say because he doesn't want to be told what to do. He resents me when I tell him what to do.

He had also JUST bought me a gorgeous $100 amethyst bracelet. Literally, just this weekend (out of his checking account). He doesn't need to get me anything else. I don't want anything else.

This is why it needs to be resolved with a counselor, I feel - an objective third party who also points out the lack of reason and logic and his expensive living habits to him. He won't listen to me. He doesn't want to listen to me.