Placement: I was the last child, but everyone was so much older than me (they were all a year apart and 10-6years later I came).

I was alone a lot as no one wanted to hang out "with the baby ". Current t mentioned that while I have siblings, with the age gap and displacement/removal of siblings, she'd say I grew up as an only child.

How did your position in the family affect you growing up?
Immensely
I used to describe that I observed a very dysfunctional family while growing up and tried to learn a lot from others.

It affected me a lot as I look back and still does.

Still learning... some times idk how I've made it this far... while I have issues absorbing a comment, but current t has mentioned, it's some what a Miracle of what I came from and where I am now and who I am.

Idk.. and as ****ed up as it may seem to me, sometimes I feel bad for wanting to be better than where I came from. But I had to.. and yet at times -I question if really am, as I have issues with bonds, still have that genetics and my own traumas to muddle through... and a part of me- just wanted a family. Love. and at my age now, at times I question if I am even sure what that really is. Other times, I am good with what love i see any given day even at work or strangers with kindness or my fur babies.