Quote:
Originally Posted by divine1966
Yes. This topic brought sadness to me.
I am 54. I was married at a very young age (20) and was only married 5 years but I remember what he said, 30 years later. And I don’t tend to dwell. And don’t think of myself as less then. And we maintained good co parenting relationship and genuinely are friends. And I am happily married (and so is he) and YET when the topic comes up, I always always remember it. I think it’s wise you are talking to a therapist about it. I assumed because I moved on, it’s not something I need to even address it. I buried it and never tell anyone. And even when my ex repeatedly brought up that he wished he didn’t say some things, I said it’s water under the bridge. It kind of is but it’s not really what I should have said.
Do talk about it.
I don’t mean to hijack, just telling you I understand it and want you to share your therapist so it doesn’t hunt you
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I'm sorry it's a sore subject for you. And I am sorry to hear your ex was so insensitive. Those kinds of comments DO hurt and can STICK with us, even years down the road. They DO cause damage.
I do understand, and it seems you totally understand how I feel about him having made such an insensitive comment to me about hair color. It STUCK and I cannot unstick it from myself. I am HURT.
I don't know how I would ever get past it, IF by chance we ever did make it through this. It would have to be addressed through couples counseling, just like everything else would too. But I don't have much hope anymore and feel I must divorce him.