Yes, that, AND, while it may be helpful to know where the insecurities come from because of one's childhood, the fact of the matter is, your wife is triggering your insecurities. My husband is triggering mine by what he said about preferring dark haired women when I don't have dark hair. I already have some of my own insecurities, and his comment triggers me into a deep feeling of being "less than" and not as appealing to him as other women are. So, for me it doesn't matter that my father emotionally neglected me as a child and helped to create those insecurities -- what matters is that my spouse's behavior is making me feel badly about myself. That's a BIG problem.