Here's my list of bad things about him:

1. He yells at me, rages at me periodically & uses abuse tactics on me when he's in a rage - I've set a limit
2. He's controlling of me -- he has held me down in bed when I want to get up, for example. He's controlling in other ways too.
3. The mean jokes that make me feel badly about myself or are MEANT TO - I've set a limit
4. He's a financial burden
5. Very little SEX. 1-2 times per month (??) We're working on this.
6. Poor Health: he's physically in very poor shape with numerous physical ailments and problems. I cannot do anything I love to do with him like kayaking, sailing, roller blading, hiking or skiing and those things have been a great passion of mine-- WILL HE HAVE TO BE ON DISABILITY AT SOME POINT, AND WILL I BE TAKING CARE OF AN INVALID? IF I leave him in TEN years, will he seek ALIMONY???????
7. Poor eating habits: He encourages me to eat fattening foods and hasn't respected my need to diet, lose weight and feel good about myself. He also encouraged me to smoke again. I've gained 15 pounds since being with him and started smoking again. He's been better about my food intake since I told him he was NOT being helpful for my diet.
8. He's lied or has omitted the full truth about something a few times to me, and now I have trouble trusting him.
9. He works on COMMISSION ONLY and will NOT progress in his career AT ALL. Which means I pay for EVERYTHING; more financial burden on ME.
10. He's a full blown weed addict and cannot live without it for even ONE DAY. Gets very moody without it.
11. He withdraws when he's moody, depressed, sick or angry and withholds affection and sex from me when he's disgruntled with me (I think he's punishing me by withholding sex and affection)
12. He calls women w-h-o-r-e-s at random in private and sometimes makes racist remarks to me in private
13. He does not like children AT ALL
14. He's not open to hearing my own music that I like. He only wants to listen to what he likes all the time.
15. He's a TOTAL SLOB and I have to pick up after him (He filled up our entire storage unit with HIS lifelong belongings)
16. He needs ego stroking
17. He can be self centered and selfish; he takes control of the TV, watches what HE wants to without asking me or thinking of ME; bought me a diamond ring that he likes, not thinking of what I would like personally. Once he TOLD me what food he was ordering for me when ordering in for dinner; he did not even ASK ME what I wanted.
18. I have doubts about whether he TRULY loves me FOR ME: AM I the one he really wants???? He told me his preference is women with DARK HAIR. I do NOT have dark hair, though he claims that to him, it is dark. It's dirty blonde. AND… this has made me extremely insecure as a result. I don't know if I can EVER get beyond it.
19. SPOILED BRAT - he has thrown tantrums when I have said "no" and when I've set limits around spending.
20. IF he is saying things to deliberately make me feel insecure, hurt me and cut down my self esteem, HOW IN THE WORLD CAN I STAY WITH HIM??