Hey, Blue, that is just your illness, trying to kill you. Don't let it do that. You have tons of people who care deeply about you here. Is it too early to go to bed where you are? Maybe a decent sleep might help.

Whatever you do, don't give up. This will pass. It always does. it is just really hard when we are in it. You can do this. You might feel a lot better in the morning.

Hugs and love!!!!