My Support Forums - View Single Post - Dear T: I really need to tell you something XLIV

puzzclar · Jun 23, 2020, 01:42 PM

T,
I am so MAD at you. And I"m so upset at myself. I don't know what to do. I have the other T later today, but I feel like I"m decomposing. It's not good. and no I"m not returning to group! I"m on the edge again. I hate this. WHy does it have to be this way? I seem like I can't change and I'm just mad at me! I talked to my pdoc at the IOP program and I feel like I have screwed up so bad that I can't get back on track.

Possible trigger:

I want to run, into the mountains, and get away from the world

I'm upset and not much can change my mind. I may have to take that new drug, because it may be the only thing that helps to turn things around.

Possible trigger:

if things don't turn around soon, I'm scared at what could happen. And yet I sit here paralyzed except for my fingers. I am so fearful. SO fragile. So wanting to run away.