I haven't read that but I was thinking yesterday, "Is it easier for addicts to build habits?" because I find that it's really easy for me to build habits.

I do chores every day and make sure that my desk is clean, vacuum my room once a week or so, clothes put away, dishes not left anywhere, hygiene every day, shower every second day, etc..

I'm thinking of maybe doing like 2 things every day instead of like 5-10 every day like I planned.. Just starting slow..

I'll do the chores today and then make another routine - Mostly I want to read and listen to podcasts. Maybe anxiety is getting in the way of that.

I can't take a benzo every day so I'd rather have anxiety - That how I stop myself from being dependent or addicted. It's quite hard for me to get addicted to something after having a severe near death experience on the bad trip. I'm not getting dissociative panic attacks anymore which is such a relief. I think they're completely gone.

I'll keep that book in mind.

I'm quite burnt out. Things will get better - I'm just maintaining my mental health with everything going on in my environment. I wish my mom was coping better - She thinks she's going to die or something before age 60 and wants a bf before she looks older. It's all very confusing to me.

I think I'll be better by the evening. I'll let you guys know if I am.