As a woman, I don't see anything hurtful or ugly about your plans; sounds like they were well thought out and I wish you luck.
I do wonder at your "love" for her, based on her obvious callus behavior toward you? That she does nothing for herself or the household, I don't understand why you "care" anymore as she obviously doesn't.
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"Never give a sword to a man who can't dance." ~Confucius
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