Will you have to continue to live together after serving him?

If so, to make life less nasty for you, before serving him, you may want to talk to him about how desparately unhappy you have become in this marriage and feel divorce is now the only option left. Have a few notes of the important things you want to say, as the conversation will probably get very emotional. Let him know you can't stay in a marriage where you know another blowup will occur. You don't want to live that way.

Then within the next week or so serve him. The surprise won't traumatize and anger him so much, as he will be expecting it.

I'm not suggesting this because he deserves it, but you must mitigate the situation to be livable for both of you until the physical separation happens.

If you surprise him out of the blue with divorce papers, then have to sleep under the same roof with him...Well Yikes!