Thanks for all of the replies, I was very touched by them. I have made excuses to her a lot and she doesn't accept them as reasonable. I could tell her the real truth, but that would be so hard for the both of us. It's hard for me to criticize and it would be very hard for her to receive it. It would be equivalent to a "job performance review" whereas she would be given a "needs improvement" grade in every item.

Last week I told her that I prefer not to hear anything about moving back and visiting. We both agreed that she should wait for me to mention something if I want to come back. We've been through that before, but a good amount of time goes by and it happens again. I also told her that the more she talks about it, the more I don't want to come back. So we'll see.

If I were to visit there, then she would be arguing with me about moving back. At least by long distance on the phone, I can hang up when that happens. And if I were to move there, then I'd get hit up with having to do all kind of favors for them. And when I'd need help, they wouldn't do anything. It's that way now.

My sister has a nice way of bullying, I think. She is very selfish. There was a time when I was much younger, that she was very nice and sweet. But not in the last few decades. Also I think that she could be coming down with either dementia or Alzheimer's, like my late mother did. Her memory doesn't seem to be as good as it used to be.