I can't give this guy what he wants. I'm not ready for the level of commitment he is looking for.

I definitely would have sex with him, for as long as he was interested. I haven't mislead him as far as my interest there.


I didn't expect that he would want to take it any further.


I guess I'm so cynical that I initially thought his wishes to take me boating and things like that we're simply a way to entice me.



I agree, the fact that he considers it a hindrance for me to hide this makes it less likely that he is a predator. It wouldn't make sense. I've been to his house, and have planned to go again without anyone knowing where I was. Now he's even offering to meet my therapist face to face...


I've considered that this guy might not be 'crazy' at all. The problem is that I'm at the maturity level of a 12 year old, and practically still live like one. For someone to express interest in me this way seems odd because I don't even have the relationship experience a kid in junior high would have.

The first or second time he emailed me over a month ago, he said he was considering having a 'regular casual sex friend type of buddy situation' with someone. I didn't know this is what he had in mind. I thought that meant sex a couple of times a week for a few hours. I'd be available for that, but he no longer seems interested if I can't be a full-fledged boyfriend. If things were different, I would consider a real relationship with him. The problem is he barely knows me, and we might not work at all as a couple. He hasn't seemed to really consider that.


I finally did ask him if he thought he might be so lonely that he isn't thinking clearly, and is jumping into a 'relationship' with someone who might not be right for them. He said he is very lonely, but that he wouldn't be considering any of this if I 'someone' hadn't led him on.


I was going to go to bat for this guy with my therapist, but there is no point. The problem now isn't that he is a potential predator. It's that I set this guy's expectations way too high, and I'm not in a place to give him what he needs, and I need to figure out a way to handle this sensitively.