Could not sleep, so, took an Ambien at 0230. Lost my mind and started having long convo with the family of three I believed I was entertaining in my apt. At some point, I figured out there was no family of three in my apt. Just me and Albert. Went to bed. Ambien.

Gonna try to edit today. Feel pretty fair, not too bad on the depression front so far, so, maybe I can work for a bit.

Managed to vacuum, brush teeth, clean kitchen and bathroom, so, that is a good sign. Place looks much better.

I have been reconnecting with my 12 year-old by writing her a Cyclist Family Heritage History, from her great grandparents to today. She is the baby of all the babies in the whole family, so, she does not know really any of this stuff. Her mom says she is really enjoying it, which makes me so happy. She and I were apart for 5 years when I was in the hospital. Very painful for her and me.

In the last installment, I told her about my depression and addiction to Ultram, tramadol. Horrific drug. So dangerous. Super potent antidepressant, very much like Ketamine. Please do not start taking tramadol for your depression, you will never be able to stop...

My ex said my daughter appreciates how candid and "raw" I have been in these little writings for her. That made me feel good. Certianly not trying to make myself look good, that is for sure. I am who I am.

Hope everyone is okay. Hugs!!!!!!!!!!!!