Quote:
Originally Posted by lizardlady
Hope, I hate to sound like Debbie Downer, but it sounds to me like he is in the honeymoon phase of the cycle.
That said, I would be straight up with the couple's counselor about your expectations of the counseling.
My personal experience with couples counseling with my abusive husband was that it confirmed for me that I needed to get out of the marriage. He said and did all the right things in session but it was the same old, same old at home.
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It's Ok.
I am definitely aware of the fact that I may still have to leave him. I know and have heard stories of therapy not helping.
When it can help (I've heard and read) is when the abuser is motivated to make necessary changes, which he claims to be.
I don't have high hopes. I told him that I will divorce him if the behavior continues.
I didn't know what else to do but give him a chance. He pleaded with me. Maybe I'm a softie and he was able to convince me to at least give him a chance.
If I don't give him this chance, maybe I would always wonder and possibly have regrets. At least this way, I will have given it my all. And at least my true feelings are out on the table.