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Old Jul 10, 2020, 11:21 AM
KLL85 KLL85 is offline
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Member Since: Aug 2019
Location: The World
Posts: 278
Quote:
Originally Posted by zoiecat View Post
I understand not wanting to have to fix ourselves but unfortunately that is all there is at this point. The point of therapy is not to have the T fix you but to teach you the skills to "fix" yourself. My T always says I am not broken but I was dealt an extremely bad hand in the parenting department. Luckily or unluckily, I have DID so I am not in it alone. I have 9 others that are part of me with 4 kids that I know of so far. T always tells me it is my job to help them (and others sometimes). This really sucks. He knows I have no idea how so he is constantly telling me what to say and do to help those little ones. I hate when he tells me this and asks if I did this or that or I should tell them this or that. I don't want to be the one that is stuck with this problem. He knows it and always validates me by saying "no, it is not fair." It takes me a long time to get onboard with a lot of the stuff he suggests I do. Eventually I will give in and baby step into most of it. I hate to admit when he is right but sometimes he is. It sucks and it is a lot of hard and painful work. Remember it is your choice to do it or not. Unfortunately, there is no easy "fix" and your T can only guide you and walk with you on the path if that is what you choose. Good luck to you. HUGS.
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You’re totally right and I 100% get what you’re saying and realise it has to be me who does the hard and painful work.
I think it was just realisation of the fact that the child part of me that so desperately wants to be loved, cared for and soothed can’t ever get what it wants/needs. I guess maybe that there is some grief in that realisation?
I think I was hoping to hear her say that although the work is my responsibility and it isn’t her job to ‘fix’ me, she at least cared and wanted to support and help me find a way through. Which I guess is the child part searching for validation from other again.
I have to learn to tolerate and get through the pain rather than just shutting it down.
Hugs from:
Fuzzybear, LonesomeTonight, zoiecat