Do you have to go? You have a good excuse to cancel, afraid to travel etc. I’d not go on vacations when I feel like this about a person.

You’ve been only married a year? I take it your children are from your first marriage? You said you don’t want kids to go through divorce but these aren’t even her kids. Or some are hers?

Was your first wife respectful and considerate or was she similar to your second wife? Is there a pattern in choosing these women (stemming from family of origin). There has to be a way to break this pattern. Your wife’s behavior is not typical and i ensure you there are many women who do not behave like this