I do have a tip for you. After I have gone through many years of my marital dysfunction, I know there’s a pattern, and it is basically the model of the cycle of abuse (see attached image).

It took me a long time to recognize there was a pattern, which I saw on my own, then eventually proved it to my husband, now have explained it to our new therapist. He had us write it all down. This is very helpful. We will both be held accountable and figure out really what is happening and solve it once and for all, please for the love of God!