Just had 2 days break from several weeks of extreme heat and humidity. That helped a bit. My mood is very low. Finally, I'm forced out of a long relationship that wasn't healthy. He left. Unfortunately he left his cat here who has been in heat or anxious or something for months now and the irritation of hearing the thing whining at the loudest it can almost all day and night is beyond insane making.

Also insane making is grieving something that I was constantly given hope for. He made his decision suddenly and is all happily vacationing with family and moving there. Totally not what I expected. But I know and realize how horrible he had been to me. Why does life just get harder and harder. I have no idea how I'm going to afford living. Working is impossible and I'm waiting for some tests to see why I'm having so much pain. Life seems so cruel. I try to find any bits of peace, if I could sleep enough I'd feel a bit better. I tempted to try anything to just sleep for a good 12 hours. I feel like calling animal shelter to say he abandoned his cat just so I can have some peace.