Quote:
Originally Posted by Have Hope
Yes, exactly. And why reward someone who is rude with being nice to them? There is no prerequisite that says you must be nice at all costs. So, avoid avoid avoid. I would even go so far as to not make eye contact with this person, if you pass by them. Literally, I would ignore them completely. And if you must interact, keep it brief, professional and polite, but no need to be overly nice and extend any niceties towards them.
And I know what you mean. I keep re-learning the same lesson over and over again and I keep expecting people to be decent.
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My view of it all is not to set my expectations too high. How I expect others to behave is not the same way I behave. I would like to expect others to be decent, fair and respectful. So many times do people who I care about let me down, but at the same time I am feeling like I am a disappointment to them. Maybe that is my insecurities and my instincts are unknowingly searching for a support system in others.
We sure do not need to be nice to those who don’t treat us well or those who neglect to keep up with our thoughts and feelings. In effort to protect myself I would absolutely avoid anyone who is judge-mental or controlling or manipulative or plain rude. Avoiding the situation or certain people lessens social pressure and creates less anxiety for me.
Definitely a way to keep things brief and distant is to be polite. Not that I would care if someone paid me more attention for being myself but if I don’t ask myself why I let all these things bother me, I will never find my answer. Or, maybe I am a grumpy person who doesn’t like to be around too many people at once. Thank you pandemic for social distancing.