From what you have shared, it sounds like your wife has some very deep insecurity issues. At one point a therapist mentioned she suffers from a disorder right? I think you mentioned body dismorphic issues? It sounds like she genuinely struggles to settle into herself and seeks a lot of attention because she needs it to gain comfort she simply can't find within herself. There is nothing you can really do to fix her disorder either, and yet you keep trying to find ways to not allow it to bother you? You cannot change yourself to fit into something that simply isn't healthy for you guy. That is what you have been doing on this vacation with her, no vacation, no togetherness enjoying a vacation.

This woman you married is not comfortable within herself, won't matter who she is married to. This is similar to your other relationship that came to an end too correct?

I tend to think of a box that people interact in and see who fills it the most, that tends to be a "needy" person who needs constant attention. This kind of person tends to fill the box with themselves, pushing others to the walls of the box or down underneath them on the bottom. A disordered person takes over the box, fills it with themselves guy, that's what you are experiencing on this vacation. If you try to get "normal" and step into the box, you end up with a person who rages and blows up the space in the box fighting to fill that box up again with themself. So you are supposed to learn to feel comfortable pushed to the wall or the bottom of the box? Why, so this person can keep filling the box with themself?

Well, you got out of one box and stepped right into another one with the same kind of person. That is what this vacation is showing you. And you need to get into the woods hoping for SPACE so you are not stuck on the wall or at the bottom of the box?

Something to think about.