Blunderring, in reply to your original question, several others already made the suggestion I am going to offer. Tell your old friend you enjoyed catching up, but you are happily married and going to cut off contact.
You mention you had little experience in relationships. It sounds like your wife had some unpleasant experiences. How about couples counseling to help sort things out?
Bluekoi, made an excellent suggestion of the men's forum here. I believe you would find help there.