Quote:
Originally Posted by bpcyclist
Thanks, fern. I don't hear much about this on the board, so, thought maybe was alone or something. Yeah, the key coping thing here is not to let myself get carried off by i it. Otherwise, I get commands and start trying to keep up with them all and it's Bad News Bears. Or, decide I am Jesus again maybe or something.
So, simple distraction is good. Kitten. TV. Read. Clean. No deep pondering allowed. Super careful to try not to have any visions.
All counsel is welcome.
|
You're not alone. I call it star syndrome or savior complex when my brain wants to think that I can heal the world. I dig a lot into various religious and spiritual texts and start to identify with archetypes. I'm a lady, so I tend to lean more the way of Mary Magdalene, but I hear you and know exactly why you gotta get off that train before it leaves the station.
I think for me it is my subconscious that sees that I need to grow in a particular way and instead of me realizing how I need to evolve, I project it outwardly onto my world by thinking I need to fix others. It has happened twice, but that's the best explanation I have.
Simple distraction is somewhat good for me, but when I keep it simple my brain overlays a secondary layer of thought on top of it. I found this time around learning something new required me to focus more and kept me from autopiloting tasks while trying to save myself or everyone or whatever the goal of that adventure is in my brain. Its certainly a special blend of delusional thought and I believe it is attractive to our brains because we care so much. Big hearts are normally a great thing, but I need to learn to realize when mine shifts from unconditional to agenda pushing delusional savior complex town.
I keep feeling like there's some big problem I'm meant to solve. Existentially speaking I don't think there is. I think I'm simply meant to navigate the labryinth that is my own mind. I keep looking out when I need to look in. Good times!