Quote:
Originally Posted by bpcyclist
Okay, well, good news and bad news. Bad news is there is trouble. Good news is I have finally recognized it.
Was lying in bed meditating when I began having thoughts from 15 years ago when very ill. Thoughts about how I basically have two different brains with this bipolar. 2 different IQs. 2 different personalities. Memories of weird exam scores. 2 of everything. And I do basically believe all that. 2 different lives. But, when I identified all this years ago, I was also very manic. So, I am extremely manic. Not euphoric, not dysphoric. But my brain is clearly in a very different state right now. So, gotta be careful. Ideas of reference, hyperreligious, etc.
Anyhoo, just putting it out there. Gonna need some help to be sure nothing terrible happens. I have had bad things go down when manic. Gotta tell pdoc.
Hugs and love to all.
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2 brains. That is an insightful way to describe it. Now that I think of it, my mom had two episodes like these. She kept calling herself a two headed llama.
Some pretty great thoughts came forward and I was processing information on another level altogether. I wrote a lot of it down for later when I have some distance when can process it properly. While I appreciate the insightful flow of ideas, the ideas of reference where I see what is happening inside my mind everywhere are frightening. The synchronicity gets to a certain level and its just too much. Time kinda stops.
I'm so glad you've decided to get help. You're jumping on it at the right time. I hope he gets back to you asap. Sending supporting vibes your way and hoping they can give you something to cool the fire in your brain. Holler if you need anything. I'm a week or so on the other side of it. You'll come through ok. Hang in there good buddy.