catches the flowers
Member Since Jul 2019
Location: Downtown Vibes, California
Posts: 15,701
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Jul 23, 2020 at 05:58 PM
Quote:
Originally Posted by Claritytoo
I had a difficult time finding this forum and I almost had a panic attack. I talked to my dr and told her I am having a ton of anxiety and depression. She said my meds are correct and I should be ok. WTF.
I was recently diagnosed with cancer. I went through treatment and am now on meds for the rest of my life. I hope the cancer don't come back. One of the voices told me I will die at age 68. I am presently 63, oddly enough knowing I had until I am 68 gave me hope during my fight against cancer. Knowing when I will die is strange. It's not like life is guaranteed. We can go at anytime but it causes me to value my time. It has also affected the choices I am making. Such as getting a dog. I don't want to get a dog that will be left behind when I die. So I have been looking to adopt a senior dog. I also have stopped looking for a place to buy. Such as a condo, coop, mobile home. Its not worth the trouble of purchase if I only have 5 years. Right now I am living in a small studio apartment near the water and feel safe. So I think I will be here awhile. I intend on getting life insurance for my funeral and my family. I also need to get a health care proxy just in case. As far as the rest of us we have become very quite. Except the other day, we were driving and I realized that the one driving wasn't that good at it. They are younger. I told them to pay attention and stop fooling around. Finally I ask us if the one who drives could take the wheel and get us where we need to be. She did. But I can't understand why she wasn't driving in the beginning. Why she let someone else drive. It was like all of a sudden driving wasn't an important thing. It is. I hope she is ok with my thoughts. Well I could continue all night but Ill stop here. It feels good to be able to come somewhere and just talk about us.
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Welcome! Is the doctor you talked to a psychiatrist?
I want to mention that no one knows for sure when you (or anyone) will die. I was told I would die at 17; we planned for that. Well, I'm 57. Remember that there's a tremendous amount of fear that is intertwined in our systems, and that includes fear of dying.
Btw, it's wonderful that you're adopting a senior dog!
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