My Support Forums - View Single Post - (19, MtF) Is It Normal To Fantasize About Relations With A Fatherly/Motherly Figure?

Transarchist2001 · Jul 24, 2020 at 12:58 PM

Okay, first off I want to say that in no way shape or form do I condone incest, rape, or underage activity. Anyone going through anything along these lines, please tell someone and get help. I was there, it's scary. But anyways, back to why I'm here.

My father left my mother at a young age, and as such I never had a father figure in my life. As such, my mother had to do the job of two parents on top of the three she was already working. So even though my survival needs were met, I don't remember having much of an emotional bond with my mother.

This... damaged me to say the least.

Possible trigger:

Not even to mention that I am a survivor of CSA. I thank God it ended when I was still younger, however it still affected me. So even though I always knew what sex was, I didn't understand it until around 11 or 12. However, even at that early active age I still fantasized about a relationshil with a father/mother figure. Keep in mind, I don't want to have sex with my parents or anyone remotely resembling them. This is a fantasy here. But even then, throughout this fantasy and several others, I imagine myself anywhere from the ages of 12-16.

However, I still have a specific type and traits that I dream about.

Keep in mind, these fantasy partners in no way resemble either of my parents. Just... what I wish they were? If that makes sense, question mark? I seriously don't know. But is this normal, like any of this?