When I read your first post my immediate thought was: does your T take any responsibility for having a part in triggering you? My impression (which might be wrong), is that you are having to take on the role in the relationship of ‘being at fault’ (which maybe you always were as a child?). I’m wondering if he could assume some responsibility for making clumsy mistakes that trigger you by responding to you in a way that’s not helpful. You say he challenges you - would it be more helpful if he tried to understand you in those moments instead of challenging you? I think that we benefit most from seeing things ourselves rather than have our T’s cleverly point things out to us.