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Struggling with some anxiety/worry/delusional thoughts.
Also feeling more convinced today than yesterday that Nazis or fascists of some type are holding my therapist and her husband hostage. I don't know what to do; I've emailed her 3 times (her work email), but I'm sure she won't see them until she returns to her office. She lives less than 2 miles from me and frankly, I would drive past her house just to check and see if it looks like there's strangeness going on - but I cannot drive yet, can't even get down the stairs yet.
I was standing in my kitchen and crying because of this illness, and because of my mind...the way it works, and because I have talents I can't use because of defects in my brain and in my history. And because I have to be medicated like a zombie in order to feel able to function.
It all makes me sad for us. At least we're not alone, like Ishi was.
SSDI hearing on Thursday. Finally. I don't expect much, but if I'm approved I'll take anything they'll give to me.
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