Quote:
Originally Posted by Desoxyn
I feel stuck in habit and routine. I'm working now.
I'm stuck in a place that I don't want to be in. I can't draw if I want. I can't focus. I'm addicted to taking something to make myself better.
I'm stuck. But I think that once I take something, then I can break habits behaviourly.
It's better than it was before where I was just taking things for no reason.
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I already feel that there's no meaning in my life. So it's hard not to do this. I've felt depressed since I was 12 and these chemicals worked for a while - Especially ketamine last year - I managed to go through 6 months of improving myself so they aren't just "chemicals". They work.
Although can have negative effects. But I don't think of them as having zero meaning compared to changing behaviour - Also chemicals are behaviour.
People ingest thousands if not millions of chemicals a day whether they know it or not and it contributes to how they feel.