I am sorry you are struggling. Yes, I have had this feeling a number of times where I just had reached my limit. Problem is, what am I going to do? Stop all my meds in protest to prove to the world and God how unjust this has all been? I did that once and it was a disaster.Am I made my life has been so hard? It has, but what about 4 year-olds who have to have bone marrow transplants? Is that fair or easy for a precious little girl to deal with? Of course not.

So, I usually pull myself back. Blow off some steam. And try to identify and then address specific issues. Is my depression inadequately managed? Am I hypomanic (Yes, I am right now, actually). etc. Then, I try to ask for and get help approaching these very specific issues with a very specific plan. Med change, more aerobic exercise, even if just walking, which is terrific. Add a group, add more therapy, add more time on PC. Paint, write, blow glass, whatever. Meditate more or harder, I just added that a month ago. Really helping me. I also decided to start running again, even though I ride the bike up to 800 miles a month. I think it will help me with my depression more. exercise is my elixir.

I find taking the perspective of other human beings very helpful when I am at the end of the rope, as it usually reminds me I have a lot to be thankful for. I don't live under the Taliban. I am not a woman in Iran or a Uighur in the PRC. I do not have MS. On and on. That perspective helps me turn my negativity around and then proactively tackle my issues, one by one, best I can. Has it been super, super difficult for decades? Yep. But my dad always said, "Cyclist, nobody ever said life was fair."

All I got. Hugs.