Quote:
Originally Posted by Miguel'smom
I'm currently on medication consistently for the past 3-ish month. thought the shot worked really well for you. Why do you want to avoid it? It requires me to go to the center 1x a month and currently I don't want to do that. I hate inconveniencing my husband, large crowed (especially now) plus I have to take other meds anyway, If I remember correctly I was having break through symptoms (not like I'm not now).
How can feeling that be okay in any way shape or form ??? I tend to blow it off as it's just a thought. I have tons of ****ed up thoughts. My H knows. I know I need meds, I don't want meds and honestly I don't think these are working well enough. I know meds can only do so much but how do you know the spot where over medicated and under medicated and just this is just me?
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Well I am gonna be blunt here, since I have known you so many years now and you have always said to tell you what I see and think so ..........
You always use the excuse you don't want to bother your husband to make the ONE trip a month needed to get a shot, I think that is your Bipolar excuse maker... If he knows that you have suicidal and/or homicidal thoughts I am thinking he would be more that thrilled to take you ONCE a month for a shot that did help you, Yes you have breakthrough , but you were not compliant with oral medication(s)
I think for you.... You enjoy the feeling of no meds , you can detach from your husband and son, You can have zero responsibility for anything..
Mental illness, just like with a drinking or drug addiction ... Excuses can be churned out non stop until you truly decide you want a better life for yourself and for your family..
I wish somehow you could figure out that you are doing the same things over and over and expecting a different outcome.
If I ever once had a nano second thought about harming a loved one or ANYONE I would have my butt planted in a Pdocs chair and accept and take anything he or she thought was right.
I truly hope you ask for help and for once follow through on a treatment plan.
Good luck