I don't relate, I struggle with life being way too real, way too intense and way way too overwhelming...

I've felt disconnected or even disassociated when severely depressed tho, but somehow I'm sure that's not what you mean.

A Pdoc or therapist should be able to help you figure out if this is a depersonalisation / derealization problem, and if so, a T should be able to help you learn how to feel more connected.

I'm sorry you struggle with this, it all sounds very sad.