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*Beth* · 07:42 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lostislost

Hi Bethrags, sorry to hear about your T being off sick so much, that would trigger so many bad feelings for me too.

I noticed you already know your pattern of not being able to trust or rely on people. These usually come from when we were small and had no choice in what was happening to us? This is true for me also.

Yes, and that's one of the main reasons I'm in therapy. This feels like a crazy irony.

I feel like my therapist is not, overall, organized or always reliable. I do trust her as far as knowing that she cares, etc., which is great. It's just that she cancels about 1 out of 6 sessions - and this is the second time in 2 years in which she was out for a month or more (last time was 3 months). She has health problems, it's very unfortunate, but her health issues seriously disrupt my therapy.

But now you do have a choice with what happens to you, you can change things and set your boundaries and find someone who can help you.

I love that you pointed that out! Thank you! I hadn't thought of it that way, but you're correct...now I do have a choice. Wow. That's so important.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Lostislost

I like your plan of cancelling sessions until September. Maybe this would give you some breathing space to not feel let down all month? Maybe it will become clearer what the next step is, if it's time to look for someone that can really be there for you. Some good ideas come when you make the space for yourself.

At this time I feel like the wisest option is to accept that therapy will pick up in September and stop feeling anxious and a stressed out wreck about her returning. If I don't receive any quality communication from her in August, it will further my feeling and belief that therapy with her might have reached a breaking point.

Thank you for your suggestions, Lostislost. I am grateful for them.

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