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rebecca1938
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Member Since Jan 2015
Location: Florida
Posts: 71
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Default Aug 01, 2020 at 08:55 AM
 
Quote:
Originally Posted by TunedOut View Post
Rebecca,

I like Tisha's advice throughout this thread.

My husband and I are still supporting both our son and daughter in their 20's because I did not follow the above advice during their teen years and early 20's but we are united now and they are much more respectful, helpful, etc.

Parenting is hard work. Maintaining a house requires significant financial resources. You deserve respect for what you are doing for her.
Thanks for this. Sadly, for me I don’t think we will ever be united as to how to deal with her so sadly that’s not going to happen in our case. For example, she leaves a mess everywhere. As we speak she has dishes left on my dining room table including a bowl with food still in it. I also just cleaned 2 trays that she had used. Yet she would argue to the moon and back that she does dishes including mine. Anyway, the point is I’m desperate to tell her to get the dining room table cleared except I have stopped making requests of her as it leads to a huge fight so I’ll ask my husband to ask her to do it, but if I don’t ask him he just walks past the dishes and it doesn’t bother him. Also, my opinion is to show a united front, he should have said to her that he heard she called me a cheating w—— and told her that level of disrespect will not be tolerated. I think because he didn’t address that with her she thinks he thinks it was acceptable. It’s a huge mess. I think I’ve reached the conclusion I just need her out because we barely speak. It’s horrible. And my heart hurts but I dint think it’s fixable. She’s had a normal life. She’s just always resented any kind of authority and refused to accept it. I remember saying to her but we are your parents. Other parents also tell their children to do their homework or to clean up etc. but she would lose her mind if asked to do those things. We went through 2 years of therapy once a week and that didn’t help either! I feel like I tried! Ugh. Sorry. I’ll stop typing now but thank you for replying to me.
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