Hello ogskywalker: Thank you for sharing this traumatic experience. I see this is your first post here on PC. Welcome to Psych Central. 
Here are links to 7 articles, from Psych Central's archives, that (hopefully) may be of help with putting what was done to you into some perspective as well as with charting your way forward:
Coping with Sexual Abuse | Psych Central
Understanding Sexual Assault: Identification, Prevention, and Survivor Recovery
Sexual Assault: What Is It? How to Empower Recovery for Survivors
Building Empowerment After Sexual Assault
Coping with Flashbacks
https://psychcentral.com/blog/unders...al-flashbacks/
https://blogs.psychcentral.com/imper...tional-wounds/
I hope you find PC to be of benefit. 
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"I may be older but I am not wise / I'm still a child's grown-up disguise / and I never can tell you what you want to know / You will find out as you go." (from: "A Nightengale's Lullaby" - Julie Last)
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