I am sorry for the ordeal. Personally I find it curious that you don’t correspond to her directly via cell and she never texted you, I assumed it’s a norm. Clearly I am wrong. I am not saying having a chit chat but simple text? Does she want these strict boundaries or you? And why would she not check emails until she gets to work? Is she ancient? But still everybody checks emails. My dad is 83 and he checks emails daily.

Thank you for your reply, divine.

Actually, it's me who doesn't use text. It's not a way I like to communicate. As far as emails, I agree. It seems to me that she could have emailed me just once, assuring me that she will be back when she's well. Or something like that. She is almost 70 and is definitely not much of an online person...that doesn't mean I'm excusing her lack of communication.

The fact is, though, she works in a clinic and I don't pay to see her. So I'm guessing that one of her benefits for not being in private practice is less demand upon her personal time. She knows her health is not good, so I suppose she works in a place with a set-up for her to take time off when she needs to.

If she was in private practice and I was paying her I would drop her immediately for not communicating with me.

I understand being hesitant about seeing a different t but if this person is so sick she must be off work for two months, how useful is she as a therapist? It might be better than none but at this time it’s like having no t.

I agree. 2 years ago, when I had just started therapy with her, she was out for 3 full months with pneumonia. To my thinking, if her health is that compromised, it might be time to retire. As for me, I feel stuck in limbo.

Since you have good relationship with your pdoc, could he refer you to a good t they might know? Not saying yours is no good but she is never there and you have to go through this stress of not knowing! Plus she doesn’t inform you directly which is frustrating.

I get updates from her receptionist, but that's it. She's given me 2 messages through the receptionist.

My pdoc works with my therapist, so I don't expect her to provide outside referrals. Although, I can certainly ask her. My guess is that pdoc will tell me I need to speak directly with my therapist when she returns, express my anger, and decide with her what to do. My pdoc is big on having a termination process in therapy. (Which is confusing, since I'm not the one who disappeared for 5 weeks.)

The major obstacle (besides having to do teletherapy with any T at this time, not a way I'd feel good about seeing a new T) is money. I don't pay my mental health team. All of my health care is free through that clinic. There aren't many options in the town where I live. Before my current T I saw 2 other ones here in town and although they were warm and friendly, I didn't click with them at all.

So, since there's no way can I afford a private therapist, I have to take what I can get, which is not an ideal therapy situation. Still, I expect a level of professionalism that is higher than my therapist is providing right now. (My pdoc, however, is excellent at her job of med management.)