Yes, we have an incredible number of similarities including the trauma at a young age. It is a bell curve nobody wants to be on and we are definite outliers. But we are not alone. We have tremendous support here and there are many who understand so much of what we experience. It is an invaluable gift.

Speaking of things we may have in common, I have an appointment with a neurologist coming up to look for potential siezure disorders. Many of my psychitic sympyoms align with that. Yours actually do as well. Hang with me for a second here...

You wrote in the first post in this thread that you have seizures. If that is the case, I wonder.... Why you aren't on an anyiconvulsant full time. You said Depakote is the trick for this mania. That makes complete sense if you have epilepsy induced psychosis. The anticonvulsant is stopping the abnormal electrical activity. So maybe a consistent dose of depakote or Tergetol or something similar would help.

Also, you are on Trilafon. It is an antipsychotic. APs have been shown to trigger seizures and doctors are warned against using them long term and at high doses for patients with epilepsy. If you read about your med it is one of the reported effects.

'Headaches, choreiform movements of the extremities, orofacial dyskinesia, tardive dyskinesia, disturbances in consciousness, somnolence, stupor, dizziness, tremor, epileptic fits, neuroleptic malignant syndrome (NMS), severe extrapyramidal dysfunction, coma, autonomic disturbances, cerebrospinal fluid protein abnormalities'

So what if your doctor is unknowingly making your siezures worse? What if your med cocktail is wrong?

Read this article:
Psychosis of Epilepsy: A Neurologist's Perspective | Epilepsy Foundation

When I was in IP I insisted that I was very sensitive to chemicals. Benadryll actually makes me hallucinate. (It also causes seizures)... Anyway, they only ever put me on a starter dose of an AP. 1mg of Risperidone and later 20mg of Geodon. Most people with true schizo features take much more. So why did such a tiny dose pull me out of it? Well, that's the recommended dose for psychosis of epilepsy. I went off the meds, no psychosis for 10 months. Totally normal. Then I get stuck on a problem in my book and research like crazy. I stare at the computer for hours. I work my brain hard. Like that board in your pic...and bam! Psychosis returns. I then take one tiny dose of Geodon and the psychosis disappears. And that's what neurologists have reported for patients with 'schizophrenia like psychosis of epilepsy'.

Maybe you are schizoaffective. But... If you know you have a siezure disorder, I would want to investigate a neurological cause as well. I don't want to project what I have going on onto you, but the similarities are so great that I had to toss it out.